It is Easter Monday. It rained gently all night and the flowers in the raised beds are enjoying a prismatic, glorious morning stretch sun-ward thanks to the moisture. Floral resurrection. There were even a couple bees for musical accompaniment–seemed fitting.
No surgery is necessary on my knee right now, thanks be to God. I am to keep on with the brace at all times (except night/sleeping) for six weeks and go back to see the doctor. The ACL will remain torn for now–stability will improve with time, though the tear will not heal on its own. I will bring the brace and a cane to Rome to use when a major walk is in store. How my knee behaves in Rome will color the Dr’s decision about whether to surgically reconstruct the ligament or not. I have no vanity issues about using a cane, can walk quite nicely with it, and find it helpful when it is needed, so I am not overly worried. Some friends have joked that a cane even suits me…fits in with that writer/intellectual vibe thing they say I have going. Don’t know about that, but do know that it works for me to use one.
Hospice has told my mother that this is the end for my grandfather so I am headed to WI on Thursday to drive with my mother and step-father to OH on Friday morning. Not sure whether he will still be alive by then, but that is up to God and my grandfather. It is good that I have the time to be there for my mother now and it will mean a lot to my grandmother as well. Being able to do that for them is important to me.
I read about the quake in Baja and continue my walking pleas to the Earth… Enough, already, enough! Thinking about and experiencing the amount of energy on which we walk every day has altered the way I think of terra firma. Firma is more about equilibrium, it seems, than any sort of real solidity. Firma is firma because of synergy and harmony, things being held in a dynamic stasis. I don’t know if that is a scientifically sound pairing of concepts, but it is what comes to mind with ecosystems, for example. There are cycles that happen, giving and taking and serving and receiving (dynamism), within that particular ecosystem (stasis)that will continue until some part of that pattern is disrupted. When it is disturbed, something must be done to restore it…volcano, earthquake, tsunami, etc.
Makes me think of Madeleine L’Engle’s question in her young adult classic, A Wrinkle in Time. Do I dare disturb the universe?
Sometimes it is called for…and the results are not always containable or predictable. But that does not mean the question goes away.